bironic: Neil Perry gazing out a window at night (Default)
[personal profile] bironic
Doing

Work has been… not good lately. My boss' boss killed a long-term project of mine at the 11th hour that I was really proud of and looking forward to sharing with people. The nix came out of nowhere and despite approvals by all the other necessary parties, proposed compromises from me and vocal support from the rest of our team. That has taken the wind out of my sails.

I also struggled in the last couple of weeks with a series of decisions that shouldn't have been that hard. Well, I've got issues, but I realized this go-round that it's not all me, it's also other people not accepting a first "no thanks." Plus I think I have to quit my therapist and find someone less frustrating. Or just stop. Perhaps not surprisingly, I've had a strange, pressure-type headache for a week and counting.

However! Summer travel provides something to look forward to. I was approved to attend a conference in Switzerland, whee, and later will be spending a low-key week with some friends on the Cape, where I have never gone despite having lived in Boston for more than 10 years when you add it all together. Grateful to have been invited.

Listening

Achieved my first fannish goal for the year by upgrading to a paid Spotify account. Being able to play music on the TV (via Roku) has made a huge difference in how often I listen, and already the influx of new artists and songs has lifted my spirits and begun to replenish my dwindling collection of viddable music. One song wants to be about The Good Place, even though I had no plans to vid that show.

Watching

Back to usual habits: 26 movies and 3 seasons of television so far this year. No oomph to write reviews, but I'm sure the time and inclination will return at some point.

Some of that TV is a new-to-me 1990s show in case it sparks an idea for [community profile] equinox_exchange, because our matched fandom isn't working out and I don't know how to do things in half measures. (I talked to my mom about defaulting or phoning something in, and she reminded me that I won't be happy making something I don't like.) There is a movie option, but the right song hasn't presented itself. TBD, I guess.

Funny story about that: One actor struck me as good-looking in atypical way, and when I looked him up I learned he's the son of another actor whose photos I've had on my computer for years because he is also good-looking in an atypical way. Consistent taste is consistent! Now I see the resemblance, although I don't think I would have figured it out on my own, especially since they have different last names. /cryptic

Vidding

1. For stress relief and a friend's birthday, I spent half a day making a vidlet of the best kind: simple, silly and short. Stay tuned.

2. Intermittently editing a Longmire vid that didn't work out for Festivids: Mathias+Walt (or Mathias/Walt), Mathias POV, hopefully funny. Somehow there are zero Mathias/Walt fanworks among the 289 Longmire entries on the AO3, despite the characters having similar jobs and the type of contentious relationship fandom usually loves.

3. Planning [personal profile] deelaundry's auction vid.

Also, [personal profile] trelkez's Self-Curated Vid Show collection went live, in which 31 vidders submitted playlists they constructed from their own vid archives in whatever ways they desired. I've got two playlists in the mix. You can watch them here if you like. I'm looking forward to getting a better sense of people's bodies of work in the coming weeks.

Date: Feb. 17th, 2019 09:45 pm (UTC)
sheafrotherdon: Two men, seated, leaning in to touch their foreheads together (Default)
From: [personal profile] sheafrotherdon
Oh no! I'm so sorry to hear about the work situation - that's awful. So demoralizing. Good luck with the therapist hunt - I hope you find someone who's on your wavelength, and soon! ♥

Date: Feb. 17th, 2019 09:57 pm (UTC)
stultiloquentia: Campbells condensed primordial soup (Default)
From: [personal profile] stultiloquentia
<3

Date: Feb. 18th, 2019 06:09 am (UTC)
jetpack_monkey: (Default)
From: [personal profile] jetpack_monkey
That sucks about your boss's boss being terrible. I'm sorry things seems to be on the general unfun, but at least there's vidding?

Date: Feb. 18th, 2019 08:07 pm (UTC)
jetpack_monkey: (Default)
From: [personal profile] jetpack_monkey
Yeah. I don't know if I miss vidding, necessarily, but I do miss having the hobby, if that makes sense. I do have access to Amazon Music, so I might try that a bit if I ever get the urge.

Date: Feb. 18th, 2019 06:39 am (UTC)
selki: (Default)
From: [personal profile] selki
Oh no, that work thing sucks.

Date: Feb. 18th, 2019 09:03 pm (UTC)
selki: (Default)
From: [personal profile] selki
I get that -- I don't ill-wish others (not when I'm being mindful, anyway), but it does sometimes help me to really know (not just hypothetically) that it could be worse. Sometimes misery loves company, but OTOH sometimes when I'm down it's good to know not everyone is down (up is possible, just not where I am at that time).
Despite my resolution not to ill-wish others, a spot of schadenfreude when *deserving* folks get their comeuppance does sometimes warm the cockles of my heart.

A friend of mine was in IT but her projects getting cancelled over and over until she threw in the towel and went into medicine (now a family physician). I've nearly quit my jobs in the past a couple of times, but just knowing that I *could* helped me not feel trapped, at least. I hope you have options or at least can enjoy your other things to focus on.

Date: Feb. 18th, 2019 05:10 pm (UTC)
seascribble: the view of boba fett's codpiece and smoking blaster from if you were on the ground (Default)
From: [personal profile] seascribble
Mad on your behalf about the work bullshit. *hugs*
the cape is wonderful.

Date: Feb. 19th, 2019 06:54 pm (UTC)
seascribble: the view of boba fett's codpiece and smoking blaster from if you were on the ground (mountains)
From: [personal profile] seascribble
I have not, I've only done daytrips, but I feel like if you drive the whole thing is pretty accessible, although some places obviously parking can be dicey.

Date: Feb. 18th, 2019 10:33 pm (UTC)
toft: graphic design for the moon europa (Default)
From: [personal profile] toft
:( I'm sorry your project got nixed. That sucks. And it does sound like you need a new therapist.

Date: Feb. 19th, 2019 05:02 am (UTC)
minoanmiss: Modern art of Minoan woman fllipping over a bull (Bull-Dancer)
From: [personal profile] minoanmiss
Oh my friend! I'm so sorry! *hugs you encouragingly*

Ah, fan works, both frustrating and fulfilling!

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